In Which I Completely Freak Out, But It's Really All Okay...Mostly

I had to switch psychiatrists when I changed insurance (which I had to do because my company cut health insurance, and claimed it was Obamacare's fault, even though we all know that's bull*).
My previous one was very gentle with medications.  She put me on the lowest effective dose of my medication, and even though I still had a few highs and lows - some days I'd wake up, start 5 projects, not finish any, take a nap, and then be normal; some days I'd be cycling negative thoughts all day, then take a nap and be normal - I was able to function and was doing ok.  I've said it before: medication changed my life.  It's good for me.
I chose my new psychiatrist based on how I only had a month left of pills and she was the only one in the whole Aurora system who would see me without a referral from an Aurora psychologist, despite how I've been on these pills for 3 freaking years and only 3 total doctors' visits are covered by my insurance so I don't have time or money for your shit, Aurora!  (My last psychiatrist saw me every 6 months or less, so I didn't think the "3 dr visits/yr" thing would be too too terrible - 1 physical, 2 psych, done.  Sure, there are emergencies to cover, but I'm poor, and I had to weigh the monthly cost vs the possible cost of an extra dr visit or two, and it came down to: sometimes we run out of food between paychecks, so bigger monthly cost is just not going to work for us.)  This new psychiatrist is not averse to medication, and doesn't seem to care how many of them she prescribes.  The first thing she said to me after looking at my papers was, "Did your previous doctor ever tell you why she didn't raise your prescription?  This isn't a therapeutic dose.  This isn't safe.  Those little highs and lows can build up and trigger a larger episode."  Cue freakout #1.

On Harry Potter, &c

Awhile back, I posted an angry rant about people discounting the contribution of fandom to their obsession of choice (specifically, Harry Potter fans).  Now, while I stand by everything I said there, I suppose I was being deliberately inflammatory with some of it.  To be honest, I do have some respect for JK Rowling as an author.  She may be lazy with her plot devices, and she may not really "get" fantasy (which still burns me, I'll be honest - you don't come in and write a fantasy book - a good fantasy book, and then go on to reveal your own ignorance and disrespect of the genre - BUT ANYWAY), but she does write awesome characters.  And really, if you're going to be a writer, it's hard to be good at everything.  If you're going to be anything, it's hard to be good at everything.  With considerations of plot advancement, character development, dramatic tension, novel ideas, etc, something's gotta give.  To be honest, the only thing you really can't drop is the characters (at least in my opinion).
So I fall on both sides of the fence with JK.  I love her and I hate her, I love and hate her books.  But mostly I love the books.  I love the fandom.  I love the characters and histories she's created.  If her books have some horrid failings, well, I can overlook that.  I'm the squishy kind of English Major (20 & 25, really).

On Young Readers, Growing Up, Moral Outrage, and Other Nonsense

Ender's Game and the two series that spawned off of it were my favorite books in High School.  I read them every year or so for a while, because I would start to miss the characters, like friends I hadn't seen in a while.  I'm told that they're not as good as I remember.  I'm told that people who still cling to those books tend to have the same crazy beliefs as their writer, which is disconcerting.  I was shocked when OSC started with all his defense of marriage stuff, because the main things I remember about his books were that they were about accepting people for who they were without judgment.  Maybe I was reading different books than I thought I was, but those books had a big impact on my development and how I chose to interact with the world, and that's meant trying to understand people's intentions and seeing the humanity inherent.  I almost want to read these books again (it's been quite a few years), but I'm almost afraid of what I will find with fresh, adult(ish) eyes.
This brings me to this article, about the privilege of being a young reader.  It starts with a discussion of Ender's Game and brings it around to talk about the way that adults talk about children's literature.  People who argue loudly for free speech, against censorship, take a different stance on children's books, because children are "impressionable" (read: "stupid").

Stories of Mental Illness

Lately, I've realized that as much as I go on about fighting the stigma of "mental illness," I mostly only post about depression - even though I'm bipolar, which is technically different, but I'm Bipolar II which is kinda the same...whatever.  Anyway, that's mainly because that's the one I can talk most easily about.  I've been there.  I've experienced it enough to know what I'm talking about.  And honestly it's comfortable, in its way (see below).  I don't talk about being manic because it doesn't happen to me often, and when it does, it's scary and weird, so it's hard to talk about because I don't get myself at those times.
SO I've decided to try to expand my repertoire a bit.  (PS. repertoire is hard to spell).  And since I've had a stressful week that is just the lead-up to another stressful week (I get to work over 12 hours/shift twice this week!  Joy), I haven't got a lot of creative energy, so this is mostly links.  But they're important links, and good links, so you should read them and be amazed.